In order to know where to buy your fake vagina, you have to know where not to go

The first fake vagina that I ever owned was purchased from an adult shop. I was in there buying some movies and I found a toy that was modeled after Jenna Jameson. I don’t know how they made this thing, but it looked like the worst abstract concept of a pussy that I could ever dream up. I don’t know if they had the molding technology back then that they have today or what. I just know that they shouldn’t have advertised this thing as being a realistic fake pussysince it wasn’t.

Anyway, the toy was a real piece of shit. On top of that, the guy at the counter was pretty creepy. I always thought that it was nonsense when women talk about being embarrassed to buy their toys from these guys, but even I felt awkward. I don’t know if he was really giving me the funny look that I experienced or if I was imagining it, but I know that it’s not fun to think about this guy thinking about you using your toy.

The worst part of it all, though, was that they have to test the toy out before they let you leave with it. I actually had to sit and watch this filthy dude take my toy out of the box, put batteries on it, turn it on, and then finger bang it. When I got it home I had to clean it for half of an hour before I felt safe putting my dick in it.

The bottom line is that you should not buy your rubber pussy from your local sex shop, because you are very likely to have a bad experience. The product could be a total piece of trash, and some weird guy is going to take it out of the box and finger it before you leave the store with it. There is no fun about any of that.

When you buy your toy online there are a couple of benefits. The first is that you can actually see what the toy is going to be, and you can check the reviews of other guys who have already owned it. This is great, because it keeps you from wasting money on toys. For instance, at Mangasm.com they allow users to review each and every toy, and they don’t censor the feedback. I saw a toy on there one time that had a one star rating. Thankfully they pulled it from their inventory shortly after, and it’s no longer for sale. I am not even sure what toy it was at this point.

I really like buying from their shop because of their discreet shipping option. I don’t have to worry that the UPS guy will take the box to a neighbor’s house and ask them to sign. I can’t imagine what would happen if the box said “MANGASM FAKE PUSSIES” and the UPS guy delivered it to 90 year old Ms. Jones for a signature. I’d probably come home to find her dead.

If you want to get yourself a good toy, then buy it online. You can check out all of the reviews that you want, and you can usually get the product way cheaper than you could if you went out to buy it at a local shop. If you’re in a rush you can even pay for overnight shipping, but I think your hand will work well enough for another three or four days. Make sure you get a fake vagina if you are thinking about it.